My Baby Shower
I watched their big red front door swing open and Kim step into the cold to greet me. The winter storm was surely going to make its way through Southern Missouri and the weather was changing by the minute. I scurried inside, and was greeted with the sound of my favorite kind of music and a ton of love. Aside from fruit, I have really only been craving sugar cookies consistently. So Nancy handed me a cookie (and sent me home with a some to "share" with Isaac). Savannah and Rachel asked me about the baby and my midwife appointments. And my heart just swelled.
Earlier that day, the Lord spoke to me and marked the shower as the entrance into a new season. I'm still going to experience trials and heartache in this season, but He painted this clear image of joy before me. And that word is meaningful to me... joy. Because shortly after I found out I was pregnant, the Lord said, "Darling, the joy of holding your little one is going to turn the rest to dust."
In this season, He is going to show me how to do something more than just survive. He is going to show me how to thrive under trial and great joy. And if you remember, that's one of my words for the year. The Lord has promised many things over this child already. And I want to share them with you because one day, if you hold my son in the nursery or babysit him or if you are one of the people who get to watch him grow, I want you to know what the Lord has said about our son.
RESTORE - In 2012 I was walking through a garden. I didn't care about the gorgeous blooms that weaved through the architecture or the handmade pots that lined the brick walkway. No, I was complaining. I was complaining to God because I didn't know what to hope for as far as children went. One year had passed. And still, no children.
So there I was, walking through that gorgeous garden while grumbling to the Lord. I told Him that I didn't know what to have faith for because He hadn't promised any children. Abraham had faith that the Lord would fulfill the promise of children. But what promise did I have? I grumbled and grumbled and grumbled. As I was nearing the edge of the brick walkway, His voice came swiftly and gently: "I will use your firstborn to restore."
I didn't realize that relationships would need restoring when He said this. I didn't realize that vision would need restoring. And I most certainly didn't think that I would need restoring when God said this. But two years is a long time. And even if you put aside infertility, they were absolutely the hardest years that I have ever endured.
Just a couple of weeks before we found out we were expecting, I was standing in our bathroom with tear-streaked makeup and crying out to God: "How much more must be broken before you come and restore what has been lost?!" Not only is God going to use this child to restore, but He has already begun.
And this kind of restoration doesn't mean to simply make like new. It means to make things newer than new: unrecognizable.
STRONG AND COURAGEOUS - These words came after some time in the Word. And I'm sure the Lord will teach me more about these words because I think that I have a tendency to overlook that phrase.
OAK - My God said that this son would be like oak. And this word wasn't particularly meaningful to me either. But I shared the word with my husband who had been studying the word or a verse that contained the word in one of his seminary classes. And my excitement grew as he told me about the word.
The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me,
because the Lord has anointed me
to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives
and release from darkness for the prisoners,
to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor
and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,
and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of joy
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the Lord
for the display of his splendor.
These words (and more that I will share later) are being gripped tightly in this momma's heart. I'm excited about this baby. And as I let go of more and more fear, more and more joy seems to take its place.
To everyone who came and prayed over me and our little one, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I'm so thankful to have a community who is already eager to watch this little boy grow.
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