The light pours in from over my head and to the right. A chandelier hangs above the bed and the breeze is only interrupted by the long, white curtains that hang over the windows. I pull the duvet up by my chin and just lay there taking in the new day.
In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly. Psalm 5:3
This verse has been on my mind as I wake up. My days don't always start with coffee, reading, and writing. Sometimes my day starts when my little's teeth start pushing on his gums before the sun is up. My days don't always start with sunshine and white curtains catching the breeze. Sometimes my day starts with getting to the dishes before the ants do.
But I will sing of your strength in the morning I will sing of your love; for you are my fortress, my refuge in times of trouble. Psalm 59:16
We drove down highway 13 toward the Kansas City airport. A thought had been stirring in my mind all day and Daniel was asleep in the backseat. So I asked Isaac to pick a word for our trip. Without hesitation he said, "bond." My heart skipped a little as he said the word. I knew that we needed to bond after a year of no sleep, forgotten conversations, and learning to do life together again.
I want to be honest with you and tell you that I didn't think Isaac and I would ever be as close as we once were. But God is able. Jesus can do the impossible and even teach two twenty-somethings to do life together as they start raising a little one.
I will never forget standing in the basement of my Uncle's home with tears streaming down my face. I told Isaac that I wanted time to share our hearts and really connect. I told him that I felt like we had lost time together throughout the year... little by little. I was sobbing as he wrapped his arms around me and kissed my forehead. Right then we prayed for our marriage.
We asked that God would bond us together and teach us how to do life together in front of our kids. We realized that we couldn't keep our relationship so isolated from our Daniel. We were essentially trying to keep our marriage relationship separate from our family relationship. We needed to have conversations, share our lives, and do the things that fired us up with Daniel right beside us.
These are the words that I feel called to say to right now...
Ask God to open your eyes so that you can see your limiting beliefs. He is able to redeem lost time, and He gives abundantly. Don't worry about keeping things so perfect. Live your life with the people around you and be free. Have you ever danced in the rain? If you haven't, what's holding you back? Maybe it's that you would have to change clothes or that it wasn't originally on the schedule. Give up the hustling life so that you can live the life that actually matters.
You're making memories right now. Let go of the things that bind you up and weigh on you - forgive, love courageously, let go of bitterness. Maybe we have bought into the lie that today is just another day and these are just other moments.
But there's purpose in today. There's purpose in this season. There's purpose in living like we have been loved.
I'm so thankful for my uncle! I have so many memories of him from my childhood and now we get to go on adventures together! He drove us around, showed us all the places, and loved on Daniel! Jaelyn and David even joined us for a couple of days!!
I am beyond thankful that my Uncle took a few photos of our family. In case you're wondering, we don't match baby socks and we love it.
How adorable is this little hat? And there's my handsome husband entertaining Daniel in the backseat!
Headed home! He had his first sandwhich and he ate every last bite.